28 weeks

How far along: 28 weeks

Size of Baby: About 2.5 lbs. and 14.8" (Chinese cabbage)

Total weight gain: +24.5 (pretty much no gain this week)

Stretch marks? Nope.

Sleep: I think I'd describe my sleep as "OK." Lots of tossing and turning and starting to use the restroom more. It's been pretty hot here, and even though we keep our thermostat as low as it can go without freezing, all of you who have been pregnant know how hot you can get.

Best moment this week: Today marks the end of the second trimester! He'll be here in 11 more weeks! That's not a lot of time, and I'm getting more excited every day to meet him and hold him.

Movement: I love his little movements right now. I see a little pokes and swishes and feel him getting stronger. He usually moves at regular intervals, and I definitely see a reaction to food (especially that birthday party cake this past weekend!).

Food cravings: broccoli, berries with homemade whipped cream, chai

What I miss: My back not killing me at the end of the day

What I am looking forward to: My shower, our garage sale, so I can finish Tennyson's nursery

Weekly Wisdom: Hmmm...slow down a bit when you know you need to. I've kind of been overdoing it some days lately.

Milestones: Third trimester begins this week. He can blink his eyes, which now have eyelashes. He's getting white fat to keep him energized, and he's developing millions of brain neurons.

Labor signs: I'm pretty sure I was having contractions late yesterday afternoon and into the evening. I think I was dehydrated; I've been fine all day today. I'm going to make a more conscious effort not to do much outside and to stay hydrated.

28 weeks

27 weeks

How far along: 27 weeks

Size of Baby: about 2 lbs. 14.5" (like the size of a head of cauliflower)

Total weight gain: +24.4

Stretch marks? Nope.

Sleep: Pretty good, waking up more with the tossing and turning and peeing

Best moment this week: Swimming and feeling weightless

Movement: Lots of strong kicks!

Food cravings: kit kats, avocado, peaches

What I miss: eating without heartburn

What I am looking forward to: My shower!

Weekly Wisdom: Not much this week.

Milestones: Tennyson's developing increased fat stores, more mature lungs and has a better chance of survival if born early now (stay in there, baby!). His eyelashes are forming, and he has started to open his eyes to open from time to time. He's started to practice coughing and sucking more intensely.

Tennyson at 27 weeks and Zooey bug :)

26 Weeks

How far along: 26 weeks

Size of Baby: Cucumber (about 15" and 2.2 lbs.)

Total weight gain: +24 lbs.

Stretch marks? Nope.

Sleep: On and off this week with vivid dreams and needing to go to the bathroom.

Best moment this week: I'm really enjoying seeing Zooey's excitement over "Baby Tennyson." She kisses my belly a lot, tells him to move and tells me her baby's moving, too. :)

Movement: Lots! And it's getting stronger.

Food cravings: fresh berries, sausage, salads

What I miss: Hm...not too much yet at this stage. I had to take my wedding rings off this week, and I'm missing wearing them on my hand.

What I am looking forward to: My husband is AWESOME, and Tennyson's room is almost done! So, I'm looking forward to that being completed. I'm looking forward to my shower and to scheduling the C-section at (hopefully) my next doctor's appointment.

Weekly Wisdom: My own: sleep at night while I can! The closer it gets, the more I'm remembering all that getting up in the middle of the night business. :)

Milestones: Tennyson can probably recognize my voice and Ryan's voice now. His immune system is rapidly developing, and he's practicing breathing. His taste buds are very developed, and it's pretty clear he likes it when I get dessert. :)

Labor signs: Some BH contractions

26 weeks

Brushing up on my baby skills with baby Gideon

25 weeks

How far along: 25 weeks

Size of Baby: About 13.5" and about 1.5 lbs; about the size of a squash.

Total weight gain: +20.9

Stretch marks? Nope.

Sleep: It's been pretty decent. Some great nights, some bad nights, so it evens out.

Best moment this week: I am SO super thankful for a couple friends with little boys who gave me their clothes to look through. It was so fun to go through all the clothes, and I think we're actually set on clothes for the first year, minus some things like socks, mittens and hats. Woohoo! This is an answer to prayer.

Movement: Lots of little jabs, and he seems to be on a routine. I can now anticipate when I'll feel him move the most.

Food cravings: chocolate, kale, fresh berries, hamburgers (like fresh off the grill!)

What I miss: I'm starting to get to that point where it's hard to adjust when I'm sleeping, so I miss not waking up every time I need to roll over.

What I am looking forward to: We're getting Tennyson's carpet cleaned tomorrow, and I'm going to go look at paint colors this weekend. I'm super excited to get his nursery done, wash those clothes and put them away and organize the rest of it.

Weekly Wisdom: It is SOOO much easier with the second one. :) I hope so!

Milestones: Tennyson's starting to fatten up, is able to grasp his hands & wiggle his little fingers and toes and his hair color would be able to be seen now. Another red head??

Labor signs: Braxton Hicks.

My next doctor's appointment is Monday, the 10th. She said that we'll discuss the date of my C-section sometime around 28 weeks. I'm guessing that means I'll wait until next month's appointment to get the date. Sarah & I were talking about how if we do it on September 11th, Gideon & Tennyson will be exactly five months apart, and it would be fun to do some of their monthly pictures together - we even bought them matching tie stickers! I'm getting more and more excited to meet little Tennyson! Going through those clothes made me even more excited. I can almost picture him wearing them. Can't wait to meet him!

25 weeks

Here's a cute shot from 24 weeks that I forgot to add last week.

Zooey at 25 weeks.

24 weeks

How far along: 24 weeks

Size of Baby: eggplant

Total weight gain: +19.9

Stretch marks? Nope.

Sleep: Wouldn't you know that once I post it's great (last week), it wasn't so great this week? I just wake up and can't go back to sleep for a long time.

Best moment this week: Seeing those little pokes through my skin.

Movement: His movement is a lot different than Zooey's was. She stuck pretty much to the side, head down, for most of my pregnancy, and most of her  movement was right in the middle of my belly. Tennyson must still be laying transverse, because I feel him on both sides of my belly as well as low.

Food cravings: ice cream, banana bread

What I miss: Bending over to pick up things.

What I am looking forward to: Getting his nursery set up

Weekly Wisdom: Things are easier the second time; you won't be as stressed, because you know what to expect and how to troubleshoot.

Milestones: Tennyson reached viability this week! His lungs are starting to produce  surfactant, he's getting hair on his head and he's pinking up a bit.

Labor signs: I started having some Braxton hicks contractions this week.

23 weeks 1 day

Total weight gain: +18.9

Stretch marks? Nope.

Sleep: Good. I seriously conk out most nights, wake up in the middle of the night and drag myself to pee, then conk back out until Zooey wakes up.

Best moment this week: Picking a spelling for the little guy's name. Actually, we let Zooey finally settle the debate. She picked the same piece of paper twice. Drumroll please....the baby's name is Tennyson! Still no decision on a middle name, but we're getting close.

Movement: Tennyson moves like crazy! And he kicks my bladder a lot.

Food cravings: watermelon, asparagus

Gender: It's a boy!

What I miss: Nothing too much yet.

What I am looking forward to: Getting his nursery done.

Milestones: His hearing is becoming more keen, & the cochlea is fully formed (hopefully he'll enjoy that Taylor Swift concert next weekend - woohoo!). He's big enough that I can see his movement through my clothes. Taste buds have formed, but he can't taste anything quite yet. Most of his little organs are now in place and beginning to function well.



Tennyson,23 weeks

And for comparison, here's my post when Zooey was 23 weeks. :)

22 weeks

How far along: 22 weeks

Size of Baby: roughly 1 lb. and about 11 inches

Total weight gain: +17 lbs.

Stretch marks? Nope.

Sleep: Good.

Best moment this week: Picking a name for Baby this morning - but spelling & middle names are not finalized, so we're not sharing yet (with anyone - sorry!). :) I also completed a small registry, which was fun.

Movement: Lots - he's a mover! This morning, I think he must've been transverse, because I was feeling little pokes on both sides.

Food cravings: watermelon

Gender: Boy!

What I miss: Starting to miss being able to fully bend over.

What I am looking forward to: Decorating the nursery.

Weekly Wisdom: Kinda not for pregnancy, but I heard a quote this week, and I really liked it, "No one tells you being a mommy means saying sorry as much as you expect them to say it." God's been working on me being humble with Zooey and admitting when I do wrong. My prayer is to obviously do that with this baby, too.

Milestones: Baby's pancreas is developing, his heartbeat could now be heard with a stethoscope, he's taking on the shape and size of a small doll & is looking more and more like a miniature newborn.

Labor signs: Nope.

Baby Boy, 22 weeks

21 weeks and It's a Boy!!

How far along: 21 weeks

Size of Baby: As per the ultrasound yesterday, he weighs 1 lb. 1 oz. :)

Total weight gain: +16

Stretch marks? Nope.

Sleep: Most nights I sleep really well.

Best moment this week: Our ultrasound! We found out Baby is a boy, and he looks great. I didn't get to meet with my doctor, because she was over at the hospital; I'll meet with her Monday to go over everything. She told her nurse she saw no concerns. :) Baby is currently laying a bit transverse/a bit breech, not that it's a matter for concern now...or ever really, since I'm having a C-section this time.

Movement: Yes! He is very active! Yesterday he moved for what seemed like a good three hours straight. Some of that time was during the ultrasound, and it was fun for us to see him moving around in there.

Food cravings: nothing really this week

Gender: It's a boy!

What I miss: nothing notable right now

What I am looking forward to: Now I get to do all the fun stuff: pick out nursery bedding and colors, look at some boy clothes and picking out a name.

Weekly Wisdom: You already know your babies have different characteristics; now you'll get to learn what makes them unique and cherish them both for those.

Milestones: Baby has eyebrows & lids, is developing lanugo, is now practicing breathing and may begin hiccupping.

Labor signs: Nope.

Zooey was SO excited at the ultrasound! She just kept saying (practically yelling) "Look Daddy! Look Mommy! Baby!!" It was pretty cute. When the tech asked us if we had names, she said "Peter Pan!" It was so sweet to be able to take her. She is now calling all her babies boys, and last night at dinner she was pointing out the gender of everyone in the restaurant. She's so funny! When asked if she's excited to have a brother, she says, "yes," and said she will be nice, "no mean" to her brother. :)

21weeks

Our sweet baby boy

Could we have a thumb-sucker?

20 weeks - halfway there!

If you want to get technical, I'm actually a week past "halfway there," since I know I'm having a C-section this time and Baby will get here sometime in my 39th week (and prayerfully not before!).

How far along: 20 weeks

Size of Baby: About the length of a banana (approx. 10.5 oz. and 6.5")

Total weight gain: +13.4 (-0.9 from last week...lost a little of my appetite because of this cold)

Stretch marks? Nope.

Sleep: Not awesome due to being sick.

Best moment this week: Definitely feeling Baby a lot more! His/her movement is getting stronger s/he grows, and I'm feeling the movement a lot more throughout the day.

Movement: Yes, quite a bit more.

Food cravings: ice cream

Gender: Thinking boy, but I don't really know.

What I miss: "real" cold medicine

What I am looking forward to: Ultrasound next week!

Weekly Wisdom: Just trying to cherish these little movements, because I know I'll forget too quickly.

Milestones: Baby is swallowing more and producing meconium.

Labor signs: Nope.



20 weeks Baby #2
 Glamour Shot: sick with no make up

 

19 weeks

How far along: 19 weeks

Size of Baby: softball

Total weight gain: +14.3 Yikes. I had some rapid gains with Zooey, so I'm trying not to freak out too bad. But this just deepens my commitment to cook healthy meals and eat at home more. *I actually checked after I initially posted this, and I was up about 14-15 with her at 19 weeks, so I guess I'm about on track for me.

Stretch marks? Nope.

Sleep: Awesome!

Best moment this week: Loving when I feel movement

Movement: I feel Baby once or twice a day, but still not a lot

Food cravings: bagels, apple pie, Mike & Ikes...hmmm...I wonder if this is where the weight gain came from? lol

Gender: I seriously have no guesses.

What I miss: Being able to clean, tend to Zooey without getting a backache.

What I am looking forward to: Ultrasound and increased movement

Weekly Wisdom: I need to drink more water.

Milestones: Baby's brain is designating specialized areas for smell, taste, hearing, vision and touch; arms and legs are in right proportions.

Labor signs: Nope.



19weeks

18 weeks

How far along: 18 weeks

Size of Baby: about 5 1/2" long and 7 oz. (about the size of a sweet potato)

Total weight gain: +11.3. The 10 lb. mark is always a "scary" one for me for some reason. I compared where I was with Zooey, and although I didn't do an 18 week update with her, it was pretty comparable. That made me feel a little better!

Stretch marks? Nope.

Sleep: Pretty good this week.

Best moment this week: Since movement is still not consistently noticeable, getting the heartbeat on the Doppler.

Movement: Yes, a couple times a day when I'm really still. 

Food cravings: imitation crab salad, watermelon

Gender: no clue.

What I miss: Well, this week I really hurt my back and decided to actually obey the doctor and stop picking Zooey up so much. I think what I miss is the way we can get stuff done faster when I can pick her up lol. Oh, well, it's a milestone for her too, and she'll learn soon enough that she needs to keep up.

What I am looking forward to: Big ultrasound in 3 weeks!

Weekly Wisdom: If you must lift, lift with your knees not your back. :)

Milestones: Baby's busy flexing arms and legs, ears are in final position, vernix is forming to protect Baby's skin.

Labor signs: Nope.

18 weeks

Sarah put little Gideon in her shirt for skin-to-skin time, and Zooey put her baby in her shirt, too. Isn't she going to be a fabulous big sister? :)

17 weeks

How Far Along: 17 weeks, 2 days

Size of baby: somewhere between a turnip and a sweet potato. Baby weighs about 5 oz. now and is about 5" from head to toe.

Sleep: A bit interrupted this week due to a trip to the hospital with my dad and the birth of my sweet little nephew, but when I do fall asleep, it's good!

Total Weight Gain: +9.6 (0 from last week, so next week might be a big gain)

Symptoms: MY MORNING SICKNESS IS FINALLY GONE! WOOHOO!! Other than that, all the usual: heartburn, stretching pains

Movement: YES! Lots more movement this week. The day I went walking at the hospital with Sarah then sat down, the baby went crazy. S/he moved a lot, and I could feel the movement for about an hour.

Go-to eats: Nothing I just had to go back to this week, but the cravings are definitely hitting. Last night I went to eat at Furrs with Dad, Ryan & Zooey and just had to have some of their chopped steak right then. Weird.

Best moment of the week: Increased movement & hearing Baby's heartbeat (156) at the doctor's office.

Gender: I don't know...I am really wondering if this one's a boy.

What I’m looking forward to: The big ultrasound on May 8th!

Milestones: No more morning sickness! Baby's skeleton changing to bone, umbilical cord is growing stronger, Baby can move his/her joints and sweat glands are developing.

16 weeks

How Far Along: 16 weeks, 1 day

Size of baby: avocado (approx. 4" long & weighs about 4 oz.)

Sleep: Better except for having a cold. :)

Total Weight Gain: +9.6 lbs.

Symptoms: fatigue is going away more and more, some nausea, but praise God not as much!, tailbone hurts when I sit too long (I didn't have this with Zooey and am wondering if it has to do with my previous pregnancy and the back labor with her), a lot of saliva (another one I didn't have with her - so weird!)

Movement: Yes, and I'm starting to feel him/her move a little more. 16 weeks was when I started to feel Zooey move a lot, too.

Go-to eats: broccoli, avocado, Girl Scout Trefoil cookies with cream cheese icing (it IS as delicious as it sounds!), this spicy mustard I got a couple of weeks ago at this festival thing I went to

Best moment of the week: Increased movement the last few days and hearing Baby's heartbeat on my Doppler (it was 150).

Gender: ? Still no clue, but I'm not really trying to guess. Like I did with Zooey, I tend to call Baby a "him." Ryan & Zooey think it's a girl, and Zooey is very adamant about this! :)

What I’m looking forward to: Ultrasound! Only about four (or five depending on insurance) more weeks to go!

Milestones: Baby's tiny ear bones can hear loud noises & Baby may startle when hearing them, body fat is starting to form (on Baby not me - HA! - although it is for me, too, LOL), Baby's eyes are making small movements behind closed lids, and s/he is practicing sucking.

I am very thankful that the last few days I seem to (maybe?) be turning a corner with the whole morning sickness thing. Heartburn's kicking in, but at least for now, that can be managed. I'm also thankful that I am wanting to eat healthier foods again (notice the broccoli up there?). I am starting to have a lot more energy and am even going to attempt to go grocery shopping and clean the house today. I was SO happy that I had enough energy to actually play with Zooey and do some crafts and things with her for about an hour or so the other day, whereas I've usually been too wiped out after her nap to do much but rest and read to her. I could tell she was happy, too, and then she played by herself for a good amount of time while I made dinner. Now, I just need to try to muster some energy to start exercising again. :)

A cute story this week: I told Zooey that Baby can hear now. Here's the conversation:
Me: "Tell Baby 'hi'."
Z: "Hi Baby!" (right up to my tummy)
Me: "Say, 'love you, Baby.'"
Z: "Love you, Baby. BABY, OBEY NO DISOBEY!" For this, she wagged her finger at my belly. So funny!

16 weeks, Baby #2

16 weeks, Zooey

15 weeks

How Far Along: 15 weeks

Size of baby: apple

Sleep: been worse this week; I keep waking up around 3:00 and am usually awake for about an hour

Total Weight Gain: +8.8

Symptoms: I am still feeling sick most evenings. :( I am hoping this goes away soon!

Movement: Yes, although baby's still small, so I don't feel him/her move as much as I know I will in the upcoming weeks. I can feel more movement in the evenings when I'm sitting still.

Go-to eats: avocados, apples (how funny, considering baby's estimated size!), pepperocinis

Best moment of the week: Zooey kissing my belly and saying, "Love you, Baby."

Gender: ?

What I’m looking forward to: Feeling better! The big ultrasound. :)

Milestones: Baby can sense light, Baby's ears can probably pick up the sound of my voice this week, s/he is practicing breathing amniotic fluid now.

Ryan and I got to enjoy an impromptu date night last night, thanks to our Hanen class being cancelled & the sitter already on the way to our house. Over dessert, we talked about what we're going to do when the baby comes, space-wise. We initially thought we were going to convert the garage into a room for Grandma, but we decided we'll just have the kiddos share a room once Baby starts sleeping through the night (before then s/he will be in our room in the pack n' play bassinet). I feel relieved to know we have a game plan for that now.

I feel like I'm definitely starting to bond with Baby more now that I can feel him/her moving. I think I'm a lot more busy running around this pregnancy than I was with Zooey, so I think it's been harder for me to just sit and think about it like I did with her. I've also felt a lot more sick than I did with her, so I think that's made it harder to enjoy it so far. I'm so excited to find out the gender! Only five (or six, depending on insurance) more weeks until the big reveal! I'm hoping Baby cooperates. :)

Baby #2, 15 weeks

14 weeks

How Far Along: 14 weeks

Size of baby: lemon or naval orange, depending on the app

Sleep: pretty good, except starting to get up to pee more

Total Weight Gain: about 8 lbs.

Symptoms: My appetite and energy are returning. I still have nausea some evenings. Round ligament pain has gotten worse

Movement: YES! I realized last weekend that what I thought was Baby really was Baby. It's still very off and on, though.

Go-to eats: Pepperocini's, cherry peppers, milk (which I figured out is upsetting my stomach, so I'm not drinking as much cow's milk :/ ), herbal iced tea

Best moment of the week: Movement! Starting to feel better most days. Also, today I went to Sarah's and finally heard Baby's heartbeat and some movement on my Doppler!

Gender: ?

What I’m looking forward to: No more morning sickness; the big ultrasound!

Milestones: Baby's urinating and has started to swallow, can possibly suck his/her thumb, is sprouting downy hair.

14 weeks Baby #2

14 weeks, Zooey

Psalm 139

13-16 Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother's womb.
I thank you, High God—you're breathtaking!
Body and soul, I am marvelously made!
I worship in adoration—what a creation!
You know me inside and out,
you know every bone in my body;
You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,
how I was sculpted from nothing into something.
Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;
all the stages of my life were spread out before you,
The days of my life all prepared
before I'd even lived one day.

Thank you, Lord, for your careful watch over my life, and thank you for the careful watch over our growing baby's life. You amaze me.

Blessings

I was hit with a realization of how blessed we are.

To carry one of God's children
To have had health protection throughout my pregnancy
To have health insurance
To live in a nice home in a safe neighborhood
To be surrounded by family
To have a car to drive
To have money to buy food and pay our bills
To have air conditioning (thank God for that!)
To have caring friends
To have been called as God's children

There are many more, but sometimes I just love to reflect on the blessings, big and small, that He gives us. "He is tender and compassionate to those who fear Him, like a Father is to His children."

Another blessing to note this week is that Ryan has a job. Not with TSA (yet), but he will be going to sell cars on Monday and eventually to probably do finance for them. This car dealership has been very busy, and I feel that this job is truly an answer to prayer. The employer was even understandint when Ryan told him about the TSA job he's waiting to hear back from and when he explained that we would have a hard time paying health insurance out of pocket. We continue to pray that God will allow and enable me to stay home once the baby is born if that is His will for me. Right now, we are looking at that as our only option and trusting God to take care of the rest. God is so good to His children, and I am so thankful to be at the hand of His grace.

So much to do

Pretty sure the ‘ol nesting instinct has kicked in. There is so much – SO MUCH – that needs to be done before the babe comes into the world. And there is not a whole lot time left (96 days to be exact). It seems like even when my ticker said “103 days left” I was ok, but now that it’s under 100, it feels like time is just running out. In two weeks I will be in my third trimester! I look back over my blog, and I truly can’t believe it was 6 months ago when I took that positive test.

I know this weekend is a holiday, but this weekend or next, I think we are going to kick our planning into gear. Ryan rented a storage unit for some of the stuff in our garage, and while I was holding onto some of our stuff (dishes, etc…) out there, I think I’m just going to have a garage sale to get rid of a bunch of stuff we don’t need. Once the garage is cleaned out, we can clean out the nursery the rest of the way, because there’s some stuff that needs to be stored (and a lot that needs to be tossed!). By the end of July, I want to have the nursery cleaned completely, painted and have the furniture set up. In August, we start our classes, so that will take up some of our time. I am also going to cook and freeze meals each weekend in August, and possibly September, too. I want to have enough meals to last us six weeks. I was browsing the internet and actually found some pretty good sounding Weight Watchers recipes that are freezable. (side note: WW and triathlon training is how I’m planning to lose my baby weight – I’m already in the process of picking out a tri with Jenni for next June/July :) ) The other thing I’d really like to try to get done is ripping the carpet up in our living room and hallway and going with the hardwood underneath, like we have in our room. Oh, and of course, disinfecting our whole house before Baby comes home. :) We’ll also need to find a place for the stuff we receive at my shower and wash all her clothes and stuff like that. Here on “paper,” it doesn’t seem like this is a lot to do, but spaced out on my calendar, the whole process will take a good month or two. I want it all done by September, in case she comes early and also to give my (at that point) gigantic pregnant self time to rest.

I’m praying so hard that Ryan will hear back from TSA soon and for God to confirm with great clarity whether or not this is the job for him. I was really stressing out about this yesterday, because he read online that one person had to wait six months to hear back from their background check! No matter what, though, I know God will provide for our family and it will be ok. The verse I got today when I got to work was Romans 12:12 – “Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying.” Yes, Lord, that is what we will continue to do.

And we're registered!

My mom & I just spent three hours at Target getting me & Ryan registered for Baby. It was exciting. I think we got everything covered and am excited for her to come, so we can use it all. :) I'm pretty sleepy now, so I think I'm going to watch Ryan play Wii Golf and take a nap. :)

Ambivalence

The last few days have been a mix of emotions. It’s kind of hard to put into words. I feel the baby move inside me, and I become so excited; I can’t wait to meet him/her. I can’t wait until Ryan can feel the baby’s movement! I can’t wait to find out if our little one is a little girl or a little boy. I think about Ryan as a daddy, about what a good job he’s going to do. I remember that Ryan & I will just have these short, precious months before the baby’s born where it’s just him and me, and I feel a little sad. Actually, that is probably the thing I feel most ambivalent about: it’s not going to be just me and Ryan anymore. No more week long trips for at least a couple of years, maybe longer depending on when we have another child. No more undisturbed evenings together every night. No more lazy Sunday mornings of sleeping in and movie afternoons. I realize we will still have time to connect, but I am also not naïve enough to think it will ever be the same; never again will it be quite as much time as we have together now (well at least for the next 20 years or so…). I’m also wise enough to know that the time with our children will be one of the best gifts ever bestowed upon us by the Lord, one of the sweetest things we will ever experience. I think about holding the baby, caring for it but I also remember how hard that task is going to be, and I feel a little scared. I wonder how we’re going to do everything financially…and if I’ll really be able to stay home like my dream has always been. I love being pregnant but know the time is short in the grand scheme of my baby’s life, so I hold onto these sweet months knowing I’ll only get to experience this maybe twice in my life. I think about how the care my grandma needs is going to increase within the next months or year or so, and I wonder how I’ll be able to handle caring for her and for a child. I look at experienced moms with their babies or their little kids and I marvel at how they just know what to do, what the child needs, how to provide for them, and I wonder if I’ll be able to do all those things.

These have been the things I’ve been mulling over in my mind and in my heart recently, just as I or anyone else tends to do in the midst of a great change. I also know – I just know – God will enable us for this task and the future, and it will be awesome.