Tennyson ~ 15 months

When I was doing all the "firsts" with Zooey, I honestly worried a bit about whether or not I'd be as excited to watch them with a second child. I have to say, I've been SO excited - just like I was with her - to watch my little man growing and changing and accomplishing all of his "firsts!" I am thankful that I don't completely.flip.out about every single illness/booboo/cry/separation anxiety episode like I did with Zooey, haha. That's pretty freeing!

Tennyson had his 15 month well check on Monday. He weighs a whopping 26 pounds and is 31 inches tall, and his head is 19cm. He is a big, sturdy boy! Ryan and I keep telling Zooey that she needs to be nice to Tennyson, because now he only weighs eight pounds less than her and is soon going to be able to tackle her and hold her down like she does to him!

Tennyson now:
- Is walking!! He started really trying on December 3rd.
- Loves to give hugs, kisses and snuggles. Ah, those wet, sloppy baby kisses - kinda' disgusting but they bring pure joy to our hearts!
- Climbs on everything he can. If Zooey's door is cracked, he manages to get in her room and climb on her bed. Once I found him about to climb on her dresser.
- Is talking so much! He's using more and more jargon, which is so cute. When he's nursing before bed, he often pops off to tell me a little "story." Sometimes he's serious, and other times he's giggling the whole time. I wonder what he's telling me about? :) Speaking of talking, his newest words include: "Baa" for sheep, "Vroom" for car," "cookie," and "bar" for his cereal bars.
- Can stack 2-3 blocks
- Colors with crayons (and also tries to eat them)

Tennyson likes:
- cars, balls, blocks
- books *see dislikes :) this kid....
- To do what Zooey does - coloring, playing doctor, fixing Mommy's hair, eating the same exact thing as her, playing outside the school in the rocks. You name it, if Zooey's doing it, he wants to do it. This includes not so positive traits like yelling, "NO!"
- The Christmas tree (what toddler doesn't find the Christmas tree delightful and tempting?!)
- pictures
- balloons
- rolling out of the trampoline onto the floor (I discourage this!)

Tennyson dislikes:
- Being read to, if it means he cannot have full control of the situation and hold the book. To him holding the book means closing it and opening it to the wrong page.
- When Mommy leaves him...yup, separation anxiety is back and in full force. Last week at BSF he cried for 20 minutes straight, because he could continue to see me and couldn't get to me. At church this week he cried for quite a bit, too. Fun times. :\

Still so snuggly

Silly happy scrunchy face

My daring little guy

nom nom

I don't think I mentioned his love for the tramp above, but he loves it

Big boy

Tennyson 13-14 months

My little mister has been a busy boy lately! Phew - are boys different than girls! Zooey is a very busy and active little girl, but she is busy in a different way (mostly very talkative!). Tennyson is very physical. He's not walking quite yet, but I'm still amazed. He is a climber, for one thing. Last week I was getting changed and left him in the hallway. When it got quiet, after about a minute, I went to find him about to climb on the top of Zooey's dresser from her stepstool! I'm constantly on guard these days. :) I've set up some safer ways for him to climb in the living room, one of which is putting pillows all around the trampoline and couch, so he can climb up and down. He loves it! He's so proud of himself when he gets on top of something. Tennyson also loves music! When we sing, he claps his little hands and babbles along. If it's a BSF song, he will say "God," which is so precious. His favorite song is the Tiny Tim Turtle song. He pats his hand over his mouth while saying, "bubble, bubble," then excitedly says, "pop!" at the end.

Tennyson now:
- has taken a couple steps
- says: hi, RaRa, Gideon, Bible, banana, ball, balloon, bubble, cheese, please (combined with sign), pop, God, "Ball" for Snowball, our cat
- can stand up on his own without holding onto something
- gives snuggles (lays head on your shoulder)
- blows kisses

He likes:
- food :)
- cars, the garbage truck (what is it with little boys and garbage trucks!?) :)
- animals
- He's started to sleep with a blanket, and he likes to cuddle and rub a muslin blanket while he nurses before sleep.

Walking is imminent! :)

He is such a little flirt with the ladies! He gives the sweetest bashful smile to them all. Last week at BSF, we came down the hall to leave, where we ran into a group of about 5 women. I stopped to chat for a bit, and they were all looking at Tennyson and talking to him. He was looking at them rather seriously, when all of a sudden, he got a huge smile, waved and said, "hi!" They all exclaimed how cute he was, and he just giggled at them. Oh my!

He's such a sweet little boy, and I'm starting to see what people mean when they say that boys have a special relationship with their mamas. He is so loving and has to have me in his line of sight a lot more than Zooey ever did (she's kind of like that with Ryan, though).

A Public Confession

My soul has been grieving something for quite a while. I sinned…over a year ago, I sinned in the area of gossip, and I find that it’s still causing ripples of hurt, anger and discord to go out. Angry and hurt before God this morning, praying for conviction and reconciliation to happen, praying that instead of being one who instills discord I could be a peacemaker, He had me open to James 3:1-4:12. I began to read, and the more I read, the more tears started to fall out of my own heart being pricked by His Spirit. I was broken by the knowledge that my spark had set off a forest fire, turned harmony to chaos and cursed one made in His image (vv. 5-10). I had felt justified in my words (don’t we always?). I had been hurt by someone, and I hadn’t even began the conversations by attacking the person’s character but by simply replaying what had been said and done to me. By the end of the conversations, however, I am sure that some insults had been slung about…all in a very ‘round-the-bush-way, of course…I wouldn’t want to be “gossiping.” Don’t we always feel justified when we’re “venting”? Don’t we always feel justified when we say something like, “Don’t get me wrong, I care about this person, BUT…”?

I read further. “For where you find envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice” (v.16). What had my real ambitions been in these conversations? Surely part of it was truly from a broken heart, but more than that, it was to have someone on my side. To which God says, “The Lord will fight for you; you need only be still” (Ex. 14:14) and “Do not say, ‘I’ll pay you back for this wrong!’ Wait for the Lord, and He will deliver you” (Pr. 20:22). I should have left my complaints and God’s feet, perhaps asked for prayer without going into a myriad of details about the conflict. I should have asked God for wisdom, because He would have given that to me freely (Jas. 1:5). I may not have received it in my own timing, like I did the immediate feedback I got from talking to another human, but He would’ve answered. And “the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of righteousness.” He would’ve shown me what to do. The conviction ran deeper as I read “What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? You want something but don’t get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives…” (Jas 4:1-3). My comments came from bitterness, hurt feelings and anger. My prayers stemmed from these motives, as well, and while I may have, I’m pretty certain I didn’t ask God to change those feelings within me. I’m pretty sure I prayed for reconciliation but no conviction on my part. How contrasting the motives are in 3:16 and 3:17 (“envy & selfish ambition versus pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere”).

As I sat with tears spilling down my cheeks, I silently prayed, “Oh, Jesus, how I need your Grace. Forgive me,” and my eyes fell on, “But He gives us more grace.” I am so humbled…I don’t deserve this. I deserve to, I don’t know, be made an outcast from people who I’ve hurt and caused discourse among. I deserve to have the same thing done to me. Mostly, I deserve death. Thank GOD He atoned for this sin by His Son’s sacrifice on the cross. Thank you, Lord!!

I re-read the passage to notice 3:2 “We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check.” My footnotes say, “Since the tongue is so difficult to control, those who control it perfectly gain control of themselves in all other areas of life as well.” First came the conviction and the repentance, and as always, my Good God didn’t leave me there, but gave me something to apply to my life so I may grow up in Him. My prayer is that He will tame my tongue (v.8) and that my words will be a stream of fresh water to everyone I encounter (v.11).

You see, I’ve also been praying that God would work on my quick temper, especially with my daughter. Anger, of course, is a heart issue, but my careless words and quick, anger-based discipline have certainly caused her much pain. Father God gently but firmly showed me that my lack of self-control over my tongue is causing problems in many areas of my life. I am so thankful for His loving discipline. I don’t want to stay where I am. I want to mature and grow up in Him.

I am going to pray about this daily. I am going to present my mind to God (Rom. 12:1-2), obey Christ’s teachings (2 Cor. 10:5) and practice speaking helpfully. I cannot tame my own tongue; a tamed tongue comes from the renewal of my heart, and only He can do that. This is my prayer. Only He can reconcile hearts. I am praying His reconciliation and Love (Rom. 12:3-21).

I really felt I needed to make a public confession. Thank you for hearing. Thank God for His Grace and Mercy.

Tennyson is 12 months old

My little man is one! He is such a sweet little guy, and he is just the perfect fit to our family. His little personality is really starting to come out, and that is so much fun to watch! 

Tennyson now:
- says some words: bye, done, uh oh, Za (Zooey), "shhh"
- signs please and milk
- knows his tummy, diaper, nose, ears, teeth, hair
- Loves ALL food, even spicy food, like salsa! He eats as much (or more!) as Zooey.
- enjoys pulling pans and spoons out to "cook" and stir
- likes to try to put Zooey's headbands on his head
- loves when I stack blocks and he can crash them down
- gives hugs
- eats mostly table foods
- climbs steps
- plays "phone" with objects
- tries to put his shoes and hats on
- talks himself to sleep
- is still nursing!

His first birthday party was so much fun! Many of our sweet friends came out to celebrate Tennyson. The kids had fun in a bouncy house, and I enjoyed watching and talking to people. Just like his daddy, Tennyson just chilled in his highchair for most of the party to watch what was going on around him. He is so laid back. He did, of course, flirt with some of the ladies. He loved his cake and the cards.

Tennyson is 11 months!

I may refuse to believe that my baby boy is going to be one next month, but that doesn't change the fact that he is. :( Bittersweet!

Tennyson now:
- Weighs 22.5 lbs. as of last week
- Crawls pretty fast
- Pushes a walking-push toy. The way Tennyson does this is so funny and cute, because he doesn't just push and walk along with it. He uses his massive baby upper body strength (he takes after Ryan!) to push the toy out, hold the toy, then kind of drag his legs forward. It's comical yet adorable.
- Got another tooth, one of his lower lateral incisors, and as of today the other one is popping through
- Is beginning to use more jargon, especially when Zooey's talking or there's lots of conversation at a meal.
- Says "ba" for "ball," "kuh" for "cat," "give"
- Tries to sign "mother" and "father," but he just ends up hitting the side of his face. LOL
- Is trying to say "RaRa" and "Gideon"
- Knows what a lion, fish and duck say and tries to make the sound when asked...well, when he feels like it
- I think I forgot to mention last month that he pulls up all the time now. He sometimes cries in his crib when his teeth are hurting and looks at the door crying "Mama." Poor baby. That is just pitiful! That's also pretty much the only time he says "Mama."
- Takes 2 naps a day, sometimes only 1, but doesn't get TOO cranky and makes up for it by sleeping 13 hours at night.
- Tries to crawl off the bed and jump out of the shopping cart at the store. This is one of those areas I feel like he's different because he's a boy - Zooey never did this! One warning of "Danger" was enough for her.

Tennyson loves:
- Animals
- Books
- Balls
- Cars
- Following Zooey around and "talking" to her
- Nursing
- Gideon
- RaRa
- Swinging
- Beans
- Bathtime

Tennyson dislikes:
- Having his nose suctioned. I forgot how traumatizing their screams are.
- Having his face wiped.
- He still dislikes it when I leave the room...even to just run to the bathroom really quick.

This month Tennyson got in the toilet water after Zooey went pee and didn't flush. OH.MY.GOSH. I flipped out! I still don't know if he ate it. I'm believing he didn't, even though it's probably more likely that he did.

Tennyson was in a wonder week leap for most of this month, so he was a little cranky and clingy many days. I took to wearing the Moby wrap again just to get dinner made sometimes. :) Honestly, even though it was a little annoying, I didn't mind too much like I did with Zooey. I guess it's something about knowing he's my last one. The last few days of the month, he was out of the leap, and OH MY was he a happy baby! He was cracking himself and everyone else up! He was laughing and giggling at everything and everyone. I love it!!

I seriously fall more in love with this boy every day. He is such a sweet little guy. He is so laid back and not touchy at all...except about his feet and his face. Zooey can play with him and be what sometimes seems too rough, and he just laughs and laughs. He is a little flirt who loves to make bashful faces and crinkly faces at the ladies. He is kind of a mama's boy (and you know what? I kind of like it. :) ). I nurse him often, I'm more laid back about his routine. I know it will have to end, but I take pictures (I WISH I would've done that with her!!). I cherish my time more in the here and now with him, and I don't try to rush him through his milestones. I try to carry that lesson onto watching Zooey, too...I don't want to rush them. It's already going way too fast. I love watching Zooey and his relationship and how they both crack each other up and find so much joy in one another. Zooey watches out for him a lot and defends him to us. She'll say, "He wants you to hold him! Hold him!" or "Stop! He doesn't like that!" Tennyson likes to reach for Zooey's hand and hold it in the car. He tries to share his food with her. It's really so sweet.

I am praying for Tennyson to become a man among men who uses his life and his talents to serve the Lord. I pray that Zooey and he have a close, godly bond that carries through to adulthood. I pray that he will be a strong spiritual leader. I pray for his purity and his future wife, if that's God's will. I pray for him to be a man after God's own heart.

with his new lovey

A little clingy this month through the wonder week and teeth

First visit to the children's museum

Doesn't he look like he's plotting something devious?

Who needs toys when you have a box?

Sleepy, sick, teething boy. Love these snuggles, but hate that he doesn't feel good.

Lovin' the water!

Overalls

Popping up to say hello and take a break from trying to match all Zooey's tooth marks in the crib.

Love

Fun in the sand...and then he ate a fistful!

Exploring

Seriously, I wish I could've bought this hat, because it was the most adorable thing on him EVER.

Post-bath snuggly towel

Tennyson is 10 months old!

Here's an update on my little but not-so-little peanut. I feel like time is going so much faster with him!

Tennyson now:
- Points, sometimes with a finger and sometimes with his whole hand
- Army crawled up until the day before he turned 10 months, when he began crawling on his knees.
- Got 2 more upper teeth, his central incisors.
- Says: Dada for Daddy, Zaza for Zooey (Seriously. I even thought it was a fluke until Zooey's speech therapist heard him. He loves her that much!) and Da for dog.

Tennyson loves:
- He's become even more of a Daddy's little guy this month. When Ryan gets home, they play a little game where they wave "hi" to each other all through dinner, and Tennyson just loves it.
- Snowball, our cat. Snowball does not love Tennyson.
- Crawling after Zooey and sitting by her/stealing her toys/laughing at her.

Tennyson dislikes:
- I honestly can't think of much he resisted much this month, except he really doesn't enjoy being fed much. He likes to self-feed, even purees...we give him pouches.

Leap Moodiness...

...and LITERALLY 2 seconds later!