Contentment

As I was doing my Bible study today, I got to a question about God's faithful servant Job. The book said, "Though Job was a very wealthy man, God allowed Satan to strip him of everything - people and possessions like - to prove Job's devotion to God. Despite utter devastation, Job remained faithful and was fully restored. List the people & earthly possessions you most treasure. Put yourself in Job's shoes. If you were stripped of all these people & possessions, could you, would you still praise God. Explain your answer." (Live Deeply, Lenya Heitzig, p. 191). I listed the people most important, followed by some possessions and got to the second question. My heart clenched at the thought of losing anyone else close to me, let alone all of them. My response was I hope I would still praise God, because He holds my life in His hands and shed His blood to save me. I pray He always gives me the faith I need. The study then listed the following verses and asked the reader to journal a pryaer to learn to be content whatever the circumstances.

"...For I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, an I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through Him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:11b-13

Contentment by definition is "the state of being contented; satisfaction; ease of mind." For some reason, when I think of being content, I think of a moment of bliss...a moment on a beach with your eyes closed, my baby asleep on my chest after a wonderful family day, opening my eyes after a good night's sleep. I don't automatically think of being content in a time of stress, grief, or even as Paul mentions, being hungry (um, have you ever seen me when I am hungry?!). I think the key to the Phil. passage is verse 13, "I can do everything through Him who gives me strength." Contentment in Christ is more than a "feeling." It is the satisfaction and ease of mind that come from knowing Christ, from knowing that at the end of time He is still in control and has His best in mind for me. It's knowing that even things hurt right this minute, He's holding my hand to accompany me out of the valley to the other side of the pain. It's knowing I don't have to be strong, because His strength is more than enough.

I am so thankful, as always, for God's perfect timing of my study today. As I entered into my time with Him today, I began by reading a brochure I got at the church the other day called "Losing Your Mom." I cried as I read through the many levels of grief that the loss of a mother can entail: loss of unconditional love, loss of family connector, loss of protection, loss of nurtering touch, loss of what we've taken for granted, loss of the person "whose story provides the beginning of our own, whose sense of self greatly impacts who we are." I have been thinking a lot the last few days how things just don't seem normal (duh!) and how things just really aren't the same when the whole family's gathered but she's not there. I have been feeling lonely in my grief, even amongst the people who have gathered lovingly around. It is so good of God to remind me that He's here; all I have to do is look up, and even though I feel sad, I have the hope of Glory, the true source of contentment.